It Wasn't In Me To Give :(

Finally after almost 2 years, today I got myself together, and decided to donate blood, but then if something doesn’t mean to happen, you can’t force it !
I went to the donation center with the idea of saving someone else’s life with my precious “Red Blood Cells” while I, myself, need some blood to continue breathing!! I couldn’t donate blood cuz my RBC counts was bellow average! Funny ha?! To me it’s hilarious and sort of sad cause this time I really wanted to do it and I couldn’t. I hate disappointment, but then as a human you learn to live with disappointment.
The nurse in the hospital was worried about me and she was like you should see your family doctor and bla bla bla... She believed that I’m under stress and that's why my RBC counts is low. I was like what are you taking about, I’m too much stress free these days and this feeling sometimes freaks me out! I was going to tell her that I got this new disease and it's called stress-free disease.
I’m just disappointed now, I really wanted to donate blood, but when it’s not in me, how can I give to someone else!
I just noticed that I didn’t take off the sticker that they put on my lovely orange T-shirt while they still believed I was an excellent donor ;) It’s says “1st time donor”! I don’t wanna get rid of it . Maybe I am faking it now, but I will be a “Real” first time donor in 56 days, 112 days, or sometimes soon; I promise! It just takes some time and determination, and to me a promise is a promise.